That's Show- business!!

As I am sure most of you are aware, if you have seen Facebook lately, I have entered the arena of the Stage. My father has made a living over the past 17 years singing for his supper around the Hotels and Restaurants of Moorea. When I arrived here 4 weeks ago I found myself singing along as he practised in his kitchen upstairs. Within a day of that humble beginning, I was handed a microphone and asked to join him!

Each day that week we practised the songs I knew, we worked out a key common to us both, no easy feat as we sing at the edge of each others range!

I learnt new choruses to join and by Friday, a mere 5 days after my arrival, I was seated next to Pape in Le Sud Restaurant singing for my super too!


We sang in Luciano's, the most amazing Pizzaria, on the Sunday.


We practised again all week at home and by the following weekend we had co-ordinated our clothing, worked out a lose repertoire and were looking good!

During the next week, Pape (ever the Scotch-man) sat down and worked out our basic living expenses now that there were two of us in the house. Including my new monthly medical insurance, all our food, petrol, basic overheads etc. he assessed we needed to work 3 nights a week. After this anything we made was technically profit, if I hadn't consumed it in Chocolate ice-cream each time we worked!

At the moment we had 2 firm bookings a week, 3 if you included our appearance at Tipaniers every other weekend. We needed another night!

The following week things sort of snowballed. In other words Kerriann got an idea and ran full pelt with it for a week. PUBLICITY!! I dragged my poor father down into my flat one evening and with the timer button on overdrive I took a load of Black and White photos of the classic Publicity Pose.





I then got the laptop out and wrote a letter of introduction to expand Pape's tiny info sheet. Very soon our first tentative flyer took shape. A joint Facebook Profile was set up -Ronn-Kerriann Falconer- complete with the beginning photos and information about us.

Next came a Facebook Group that we out grew within 2 days. Then came the Facebook Page! Ron-Kerriann Falconer.

Information flowed around the network, Uschi also working overtime as ideas flowed in. E-mails, friend additions, Likes, advice and photos appeared daily. The dates of our established appearances were published, Events were displayed, links were made between ourselves and the restaurants were performed at.

Friends from all over the world did their bit, linked their friends and helped to create a huge network of information. By the end of the week I was exhausted!

We sang again that weekend, friends coming to support us now that we had let it be known where we were, but we still needed that 1 extra day!

My father is not a public man! This may come as a surprise to those who see him performing each week, but once the roll of 'Performer' is over, he finds it quite difficult to 'Put Himself Out There' so to speak. So it was not the most enthusiastic of fathers that I dragged around all the local hotels armed with a freshly printed array of flyers and business cards, this week.

He was apprehensive as we approached the main desk of the Pearl Resort asking for Isabelle, a friend who has been so encouraging it has been unbelievable. With relief he handed over the flyer, having explained our mission, and retreated gratefully to the van.


Three days earlier we had spent a wonderful evening at the Legend, high up on the hill, listening to Bill and Rom sing the evening away with rocking blues! We had danced on the terrace as Bill and Rom had cranked out one popular Blues after the other. At the end of the evening, as we all mingled and chatted, the Manager there, Jean Louis, was most encouraging when we had mentioned our own singing abilities, so this was to be our next stop.

The climb up to the resort is steep and winding but once there, the view is spectacular.(If you line the pamoranic view finder up correctly!)


Jean Louis speaks wonderful English, so I allowed Pape to stay quietly in the background as I sold our fate, while staring in amazement at the view.


At the edge of the infinity pool there is a full 40foot drop-off down the side of the mountain, it really is unbelievable there!!


From there we wandered down to the Intercontinental (The Old Beachcomber as it was formally known). The Entertainments manager was at a meeting and we were asked if we could wait for about 15 minutes until he had finished.



We smiled encouragingly and strolled down to the pool,

we gazed out over the beach,



we meandered along the jetty,

taking photos as we went.


We sat in the large high backed chairs and watched the world sail by.



Fredrick was a well dressed, enthusiastic, young man. Again he spoke perfect English, so I took over the explanations of our visit. He seemed very positive and took our flyer with an encouraging air that he was sure something could be arranged. We smiled, kissed in true Moorean fashion and headed off to the next potential venue.


To be fair we only called into the Hibiscus for an Ice-cream.

It was while sitting on the terrace, relaxed and at ease for the first time that day, that Pape got chatting to one of the staff he had known when he had performed there many years ago. I quietly ate my vanilla, chocolate and coco ice cream as they nattered away in French.

I took a few photos as they became engrossed in their conversation, enjoying the sun and the view.


When the conversation had finished, Pape looked at me in amazement. New management had taken over the place 3 weeks ago and they were looking for entertainers!! We collected a flyer from the dashboard of the van and headed into reception. There, on the advice of our helpful member of staff, we asked if it was possible to meet Patritica.

An elegant bubbly yet obviously tired lady approached us, we greeted, kissed and explained our purpose. If we could be of service to her establishment, we said, we would love to have the opportunity to perform at her complex. We had our own equipment, we were available any day except Fridays and Sundays.

She too was encouraging. She had thought about starting a music program in January but wasn't sure about having the same thing every week. I suggested we could work alternative Saturdays allowing her to book different acts for the weeks in-between. This she said was ideal!

With a promise to be in touch nearer Christmas we handed over our flyer for her files and passing the beautiful gardens once again, we returned to the van!

Every other Saturday would fit in divinely with the alternate Saturdays we already were committed to at Tipanier. We now had work every Friday, Saturday and Sunday, once January arrived.


That still left us the next two months to sort out. We dropped a flyer in the Hilton, wandered the grounds and consumed more ice-cream, we called into the Kaveka and had a brief meeting with Greg as he rushed out to the Airport, we dropped a flyer into Alfredos, also under new ownership and renamed the …................ we returned home!

I was happy, Pape was stressed!

Then the dog got sick!

Although Whiskey is well on the mend, the next few days were spent going back and forth to the vets. Practices became more critical as we learnt new songs, perfecting timings and words. The web was checked daily, updates posted, new photos loaded and responses answered. I was on a roll!

Unbeknown to me, upstairs my Pape was suffering. Gone was his tranquil life, gone were his mornings watching footie, gone were his hours of musical solitude, gone was his peace of mind!

I had French translations to be done, something I have no ability to do. Posters and notice boards needed to be built, I needed his help and asked for it freely, so caught up in my own drive that I failed to see his equilibrium beginning to tumble around him.

This Saturday, when we performed, we performed well. We performed professionally, every eye in the restaurant turned upon us. The melody was true, the customers attentive, but the fun of the past performances was lacking.

As we drove toward Le Sud in a race to catch the last of Mimife's performance after our show, I asked why he was feeling so stressed of late. He answered he wasn't used to being the centre of attention. When I said he should just sing to me then, he replied that made him WORSE!

He worried about his timing, his enunciation, even getting the correct words!! (among other things I had pointed out the correct versions to a couple of the songs we sang during the week!!) He was now even getting stressed about being stressed!!!

I sat quietly as we continued the drive, thoughts racing in my head.

Mimife's performance was spectacular. A wonderful Soul Singer, she bounded around the place so full of energy, involving people, encouraging audience participation and generally having a good time.



Pape relaxed, he chatted to people around us, all fellow musicians, singers, performers. We were now with the 'IN CROWD' and he was content back amongst his safe friends. Jan Prince wandered over laughing and joking, I laughed that I was causing my father anxiety.

She confirmed, with a broad smile, what was already settling in my head. My over the top enthusiasm needed to slow down, just a touch, before I burnt my Father out!!! He wasn't used to this much activity!



And so today, I sit quietly down stairs. The bananas are drying in the modified Solar cooker.


The dogs sat attentively this morning as I explain that barking at the neighbours is NOT polite behaviour and I would be most grateful if they would cease this anti-social behaviour.


Lecture over, they wait patiently for me to finish turning the drying bananas, wondering if all this devout listening was to be rewarded by a biscuit, and apparently happy to have their lives re-organised!!


P.S. the Kaveka just phoned – we are booked this Tuesday for a trial run. If he likes us we can have a regular slot!!! lol xxx

I wonder what time the rest will call???

Peace once again reigns in Paradise!!

A Womans Work!

Moorea!

An opportunity to slow down, to relax each day as the sun works its way into the brilliant blue sky. A place where I could sit around and simply be!!

Who was I kidding!!

Having spent a good part of my life picking things up after my children, arranging their lives, ensuring their safety and casting then out into the Big Wild World, I have managed to replace them with an even more demanding substitute! The Garden!!

No longer do I crawl around picking up toys and clothes, now I spend each morning, before the sun reaches the height of pure heat, gathering the leaves that my playful trees have thrown around as they tarried with the breeze the previous evening. As my own children grew, their responsibility towards their own welfare increased. The same can not be said for my trees. The large maturing children cast their leaves around in total abandonment of any resulting consequences, I swear they were planted in the 60s!!!


Compost bins lie located all around the garden, like open toy boxes. Do they deposit their leaves in these?? Do they Hell!! They pile them up in the corners, they scatter them liberally onto the grass, they even invade and disturb the sweet babies as they snuggle in their beds! Unruly children I have coped with and survived, my trees test my patience, as each morning I gaze out of my window onto their abandoned destruction once again!

But like children, just when you think you have reached the end of your patience, a smile, a seedling, a flower, evaporates all the strain, all the tension melts away and you gaze at your garden with pure love and adoration!

Beneath their 55% protective cover, the lettuce, cabbage, Basil, spinach and courgette spread their leaves, growing stronger every day.


In the large bed above them flowers explode upon the large courgettes, tomato plants stand true and strong. The vine snakes its way around the poles, new shoots appearing on its stem where we have harvested its leaves for our supper.

The Pineapple grows daily before my eyes, the bananas ripen in the trees.


My Garden is Growing!


Lisa, (a grown, mature, pick it up yourself, offspring!) has also had a challenging few days. A Climbing Competition in London! The climb was the easy bit as she is an excellent climber and thoroughly enjoys pushing her body to its limit in strenuous moves and complicated manoeuvres. Her challenge was to write about it for the club notice board!!

Lisa has an excellent ability to write. Her essays through University, her introductory letters to potential employers, even the introduction to her CV, is descriptive, informative, flowing and easy to understand. Yet she hates to write. It is an effort, a chore, and so yesterday, via the wonders of the internet, she sent me a brief description of the days events and asked me for help.

This may come as a surprise to you but I just love to write. I used to love to talk, but I ran out of people to talk to and so I discovered the Blog page and the joys of writing.

Taking the 20 lines of information Lisa has supplied I sat down at my wonderful desk, as the sun reached the height that says “Step outside and I will fry you instantly!”, and began to write. An hour later I had a story. Possibly one of the most unusual stories that I have ever written as I wasn't there! I wanted to describe the Hall, the atmosphere, the mood of the team. These details Lisa had left out. With a time difference of -11 hours I also couldn't call her to ask for more information, and so I wrote …..

“Once assembled, our (tired, excited, enthusiastic) team moved into the foyer (or where ever you went in) We were ushered through all the form filling by the helpful organisers of the competition until finally, with an encouraging smile, our trusty score cards were issued. With these clutched in our hands (or safe in our pockets, bags, or gathered by whoever for safe keeping) we entered the arena!

(describe the room) Mile End Climbing Club boasts a (huge, modest, expansive, intimate, small) array of climbing walls. (tall, short but complete, well laid out, all the previous above words, expansive etc) walls surround a (small sitting area, open standing area, lie either side of a long corridor?? help me out here girl!!)The bouldering section is situated in (another area, the middle, to one side) of the main walls.”

And so the story continued!!

I pressed SEND on the PC and sat back!

While my mind was concentrated on word formation, I also compiled a flyer, information sheet and Poster for 'RON & KERRIANN' ( Mooreas Latest Duo, in case you haven't heard!!).

I searched for, located, copied and pasted, lyrics to a few more songs onto my memory stick. I updated the 'Publicity Profile Page' with forthcoming events. Now that my morning job of Garden Maintenance had finished I was able to assume my role of Private Secretary!!

Oh, my role of Nursemaid to the four legged residents is also coming along fine! I have yet to introduce you to the other residents of Journey's End, namely, Nessie (as in Lock Ness) Tattoo (as in Edinburgh) and Whiskey (as in ….. well you are getting the Scottish theme I guess!)

These three canines have found themselves homes with Pape by default! Nessie arrived on his door step 6 years ago and has yet to leave.

Tattoo is a rescue dog too and Whiskey is the result of a night on the town with the boys (that's Tattoo's night out not Papes!!)
Each night either Nessie or Tattoo is dispatched to guard my door. The night Whiskey got the job she wandered off to our neighbour Jan, pleading abandonment and begging for shelter!

Tattoo loves being out, she wanders the garden, rustles around in the long grass searching for land crabs, she barks at the lizards, checking out all of our boundaries before settling down on my doorstep for the night.

Nessie, the only boy of the bunch, is not as self assured. He sits outside afraid of the big, dark, open sky. He stands in terror as the rain begins to fall, he whimpers pathetically as the breeze blows leaves across the doorstep, and so we have taken pity on this fierce butch dog and made him a cubbyhole to hide in! Each evening, fortified with a handful of biscuits, he retires into his new den, peeking sheepishly through the legs of the table, as I lock my door and climb into bed!

Whiskey, oblivious to all this lies asleep in her kennel in the garage. The youngest of the bunch with a loyalty factor driven by her belly, who seems happy to roam and get herself into all sorts of bother. She is not the prettiest of dogs, although she is incredibly lovable, she sort of reminds me of a gangly tomboyish teenager, who hasn't quite found her beauty yet. She also unfortunately suffers from a skin allergy (Teenage Acne?) which causes her to scratch relentlessly. She is bathed each week in medicated shampoo, as are the others just for the fun of it all!

Her latest adventure, misdemeanour's, whatever it actually entailed, resulted in an very swollen ear! An ear so swollen it hung down the side of her face like a half inflated balloon. Within 24 hours it was twice the size causing her whole head to lean over giving her a pained expression, so a trip to the vet was required!

I can not tell you the exact problem as the whole visit was conducted in French, but Whiskey ended up staying there for the day having a general anaesthetic and an operation to drain said earlobe of infected fluid!

She was returned to us in a most unusual state!! A turban style bandage pressed the drained ear against her head, a small growth has also been removed from her leg. Although she seemed happy to run and play, her lopsided appearance caused the other dogs to wonder and they examined her from the top to the bottom of all four toes when she returned to the fold.

Four days later it was time for a check up. She positivity bounded into the back of the van, enthusiastically posing for her photo as we drove along.

At the vets the ear was checked and we were offered one of those lampshade collars as a replaceable to the turban! Knowing this dog as we do, we opted for a replacement turban and with a nice clean bandage she has returned home for another week. Stitches are due out on Friday, I shall keep you posted!


And so today, having played Nursemaid, Gardener, Secretary,and Singer yesterday, I am going out to lunch! Decadence, I hear you ask?

Don't you believe it! We are lunching at a Restaurant that Pape played in a few years ago, and we will just happen to have a few flyers on us, as we accidentally bump into the owner having enquired about his Health and Temper!!

At least I will get an Ice-cream out of the day!!

Pineapples and Pumpkins

The rains are back!

After two weeks of solid sun the clouds have returned. Cool breezes rush in from the sea carrying moisture with them. The trees again sway violently back and forth, the gusts of damp air rush through my open mesh windows but this time I do not mind. This time I welcome the rains and their life giving resources. My babies are in the garden. My babies that have been battling the relentless sun. My babies that have been moved from their nurturing tubs, moist and shaded, and stuck into what to them must feel like the Sahara Dessert.

One of the projects Pape and I have undertaken (apart from the singing, shelf building, shopping, cooking and reading) is to try to grow as much of our own food as possible. Fresh food, although plentiful in the shops and absolutely delicious, is, none the less, grown with fertilizers, pesticides and is very very expensive. As are most things here!

When Pape visited the UK last year he saw the large raised beds in my garden, I also dragged him repeatedly around C.A.T. showing him all the incredible things they had done there, concentrating mainly on their gardens constructed on what started off as pure stone. When he returned to Moorea he proceeded to build 4 long raised beds. No easy feat on this volcanic bed rock. These he has filled with compost, leaves, seaweed and earth and then baked under black plastic until my arrival three weeks ago.

While I unpacked my belongings, he pulled back the plastic cover on one of the beds to reveal dark moist earth begging to be used.

24 hours after my arrival, I was sowing seeds into pots and standing them in the shade on an old table we had found. In less than 20 days these first few seeds have not only sprouted, but have grown big enough to be placed into the awaiting beds.


The 'potting shed' has been moved from the lawn to just outside my front door. From here I can see them daily and pop out to move, rotated, water, and protect these tiny babies as they battle their way into the world!

Seeds have been sourced from the most unusual places. We wandered up to a small holding that sells fruit and veg half way up a mountain. I was concerned about the heat exhaustion my poor babies were having to endure and wanted to see how the locals did it, so to speak.

We arrived at 8am, the sun well above the horizon, the sun already baking the earth dry. As we climbed the hill we walked over pumpkin fronds snaking them selves across the road, large orange coloured fruit dotted here and there.

Huge sweet grapefruit littered the floor beneath the trees, limes and oranges hung from the branches of withered looking trees. Despite being on a sheer hill, with run off that would have frightened even the hardiest of Welsh hill farmers, the plants seemed to be doing OK. We collected a pumpkin, took a few photos for reference and returned home.


The pumpkin, cooked with garlic and onion, was delicious, the seeds were stuffed into yet another pot and put to join the growing collection. A tomato, destined for a sandwich, was de-seeded along the way, these seeds also ended up in a pot. At the hardware store, parsley, coriander, leeks (!) and cabbage seeds were found and added to the seed assortment jar.

Some French beans abandoned in the shed were sown, the pepper seeds from lunch were covered in damp earth and placed on the table. An Avocado seed from Jan's supper was placed semi submerged in water and added to the table.


One by one the pots began to sprout. The pumpkin seeds were up within 3 days!!! About 20 of them!!!! Others seem to be taking their time! I keep telling myself, as I walk out of the door each morning to check on their progress, it has only been 5 days, 6 days, a week...... but the pumpkin seeds are now huge!!!

In the first raised bed, damp from the rains now it had been stripped of its thick black plastic cover, we have planted two huge courgette plants, plus two little ones, the 3 French beans that survived, a sprinkling of spring onions and a salad vine given to us by a friend! Each day we have watched the sun pound these poor things, we have seen their leaves wilt in the mid day onslaught only to recover in the cool of the evening.

Today, despite our firm belief that our little babies should be left to fend for themselves, to grow against the adversity of the heat, to fight their way to survival like their brothers on the mountain, we took pity on them and picked up a long piece of 55% shade mesh!


This now lies on the floor of my room along with two sturdy poles, awaiting my attention in the morning. Hang in there boys, help is on its way!!

We have also had a plan as to how to utilise the garden more fully. A lot of the garden is just sloping grass with large rocks scattered throughout.


Pineapples are quite easy to grow here. You cut the top off your pineapple, eat the bit you want and put the top into a pot! A few months or so later, you dig a hole in your garden and, very carefully due to the fact that they fight back once they get big, plant your pineapple shrub. From the centre you will get a new pineapple followed by a whole load of spiderlike baby pineapple plants ready to make new Pineapple bushes!


These things, as I said, fight back once they get big and should never be allowed near raised beds full of delicate lettuce. Total abandonment in the middle of the garden, we have decided, is the best place for these fiends. The triffid style pumpkins are also destined to be positioned far away from the civilised plants and allowed to rampage their way down the embankment. Water also poses a bit of a problem. At the moment the rains have emptied their loads onto the parched earth, our water tank has refilled and everything looks green. But I know in a few days the rains will stop again, the sun will bake the earth and the water tank will stop filling.


I have also become concerned about the amount of water we waste each day, washing up, cleaning our teeth. Both Pape and I are extremely concious about the water usage here, after all the water tank has to last from one set of rains to the next and you are never quite sure how long that will be. Never the less, all the water that goes down the drain, ends up in a soak away beneath a very healthy patch of grass!

Last night we finally ended up with a workable plan. The grey water settling tank, the surface water collection system, plus the nitrogen rich water from Papes urinal, would, once we built it, be redirected into a constantly open trickle system that we could move around the garden. This water mixture would be allowed to trickle into the bases of our wild plant area, feeding the voracious pineapples, the rampaging pumpkin, the wilting lemon tree, each taking its turn, each getting a little something every day between the rains.

As we waited for our 55% shade mesh to be cut, we collected the various components to our by-pass system along with a super battery recharge unit plus 4 spare batteries. If we are going to live the low impact life, recycling all we can, then a few investments need to be made and I am afraid my camera eats batteries! The camera is the only non rechargeable thing I own. My lap top runs from solar power, my phone is charged from solar power, my lights and the hot water from my taps is all solar power and we have a lot of solar around here! My camera takes 4 AA batteries every two months! Until now.....

4 rechargeable batteries were today filled as the sun powered our solar electric supply. 4 fully charged AA batteries were placed into my camera as the second set were placed into the charger and the still half full batteries that had occupied the camera were placed in the side pocket of the carry case for emergencies. The rechargeable batteries will probable be less efficient than the bought non-rechargeable ones but I have two sets, one to charge and one to use, I have unlimited sunshine and power, if I have to charge them daily, it does not matter, this is free energy, and more importantly this is non-polluting battery recycling.

The other totally mind blowing life fulfilling thing we have come up with is the 'SUN TENT!' (And you thought i was coming out here for a rest!!)

Now I like the sun. I love to lie for hours in the sun. I love to bake my body black, risking skin cancer, wrinkles, cafe spots, premature ageing (mind its a bit late for that now!!). But, I DO NOT LIKE MOSQUITOES!

Mosquitoes here are rife between the hours of 6am and 11am. They are 'around' between 11am and 3pm. They take to the sky's to swarm about the place from 3pm until dark, then they linger in the darkness feeding on everything that sets foot outside of the door. The only way to keep the little darlings at bay is mossy spray, a chemical infused concoction that just can not be good for the body!

The other thing that works is the local answer of Monoi Oil infused with citronella. Between the hours of 11am and 3pm, IF one covers themselves with Monoi Oil, one can get a good 2 hours outside without being bitten, well not being bitten much. The only problem with this is in the words, OIL and MIDDAY SUN!

Now I am a total sun worshipper. I would even go so far as to call myself a professional. I have baked my skin with oil and vinegar in the UK, I can subconsciously rotate my body ensuring all surfaces are cooked evenly, I can sleep with one arm raised above my head to brown those hard to reach places but even I can not stay out for more than 20 minutes covered in oil in the midday sun of Moorea.


It has been a hard choice, mossie attack yet bearable heat at 9am, or barely bearable mossie annoyance covered in oil in the full heat of the sun. I have done them both. I have suffered for my vanity, I have rubbed soothing oil onto my wounds. But no more!!


Today, along with the seed planting (we bought more compost this morning too), the water system construction, the 55% shade mesh installation, we came up with an idea to not only protect me from the blood sucking little beasties but also slightly from the sun. Today we carried my mosquito net from my bed and installed it in the Garden!!! I can now sit, lie, read, eat, sleep, reassured that I am alone, with a possible 5% shade factor to boot!! My life is complete!!

And so another week comes to an end. The wind is blowing a wonderful cool gale though my open mesh windows as I sit typing this. All the mossies are outside (except for the two who keep whining past my ears) and I have yet to tell you all about the singing ideas and the solar cooking!

But not tonight. It has been a busy day already and it is time for bed. Good night Dear readers, sleep well, with love from Moorea. xxx

PS the Finished Plant Protector is in place and working fine!!!